Closure.

Today was Grandpa Jack's unveiling. 


In Jewish tradition it is when the tombstone is revealed for the first time. It is usually accompanied by a small service by a Rabbi and speeches are given by loved ones and family. It was a wonderful service, small, heartfelt and meaningful. It gave a lot of closure to Esther (Charlies' mother and the oldest of Grandpa Jack's daughters) which is definitely what she needed.

Mindy (Esther's sister), Esther, Charlie and Gina(Jack's sister-in-law) all gave wonderful speeches. Mindy spoke of how she would remember all the good times and how hard working her father was. Esther spoke of Grandpa Jack's love of food and how she would carry that with her always. Gina, a very exuberant character herself, spoke about how close they grew in the past 30 years and how she now has no one to fight with. We all laughed:). Charlie had decided to read the story that Grandpa Jack had wrote about him and his sister.

After the unveiling, we all had lunch together at the restaurant in the hotel with all the loved ones that joined us. After that we spent the afternoon with Esther visiting all the places she used to go with her Father. One of the places was Atwater Market, a wonderful farmers market that is open all year round. We strolled up and down the isles, closely and carefully examining all the counters, tasting cheeses and fruit from the various vendors. The very same way Grandpa Jack would with his daughters. Esther even managed to get some white apples, apparently they are only grown in Quebec and only available late July to mid August. They are VERY tart. Think of a granny smith on steriods. She  told us stories of how she used to eat so many of them they would make her sick. We even picked up her favorite honey, raisin and hazelnut bread. She was happy and sad all at the same time. Happy to relive memories of her father, Sad remembering that fact that there are no more memories to be made.

All in all, it was a wonderful day. Grandpa Jack would be proud of all his children and grandchildren.

Remembering Grandpa Jack...

Grandpa Jack is Charlie's grandfather on his mothers side. Sweet old man who passed away at the age of 93 last year. I had the pleasure of knowing him for one summer while he lived in Winnipeg and never has anyone had such an impact on me.

Grandpa Jack was just the purest form of love you could ever ask for. Sweet, thoughtful, kind with a  quiet, unassuming kind of strength that you would only dream of having. I fell for him the very first time he held my hand while I was helping him up some stairs. It was something about the way his kind eyes would look right  to your soul that got me. It felt like in an instant he knew everything about me and didn't care about any of my flaws. He just loved me because I was dating his Charlie. We almost always got seated beside each other during family dinners, I'm not sure if it was by chance or the way he wanted it to be. At 93, no one questions where you want to sit or if you happen to fall asleep at the dinner table (it happened a few times, I just made sure to nudge him a bit further back into his seat so he wouldn't fall over).  I remember him always commenting on how big the portions were and how one of should take half his steak home with them.

Grandpa Jack was a self made man. He owned a plumbing business in Montreal and where his wife did the books until she passed away. He then proceeded to run the business and raise 3 daughters on his own. No one did that back then, there was no such thing as a single father of 3 girls. But he did it, he raised them well and on his own. He was also a writer, sculptor and an avid gardener. Apparently his garden was the talk of the town and he was always very generous with its contents.

While at dinner at my in-laws house this Saturday, I had come across a thin green hardbound book. Something was calling me to as it was underneath a few papers. I pulled out and in gold writing is said: A Moment to Remember A collection of essays and poems by Jack Ravinsky. I was immediately enthralled. I opened it up and started reading... he wrote from his soul. It was honest, bold and unassuming much like he was in life. His imagery is amazing and was published in local papers and magazines all around town. We were all getting ready to go and I asked my mother in law where I could get a copy for myself. She paused and turned.
"do you realize what that is?"
"yes! It's grandpa Jack and I would love a copy!"
She seemed stunned at the fact that I would take such interest in such a small book but if you knew the man, you would want a copy too.
"oh, you know what? I have a few copies. Take that one. It's yours"
"are you sure you have another copy for yourself"
"yes, its right here. See? That one is now yours"
"thank you, I love it already!"
And I put it my purse as we said our goodbye and left for the night.

It stayed in my purse all Sunday until I got home from work. Charlie was about to go out to Shouresh's place for some well deserved guy time. I chose to stay at home and Netflix my night away. I started 'Love Actually" and near the end I picked up the book and started flipping through. I got to a story called Remembering Passover. The first sentence was about how a very young Charlie invited him to Winnipeg for passover this year. I couldn't stop reading and for some reason tears started flowing down my cheeks as I read. He thought so highly of his only grandson. Remarking on some of his smart ass comments and calling him smarter than some of our so-called world leaders. Charlie walked in the door while all this was happening, rushed over to me and in very concerned voice asked me
"what's wrong?"
I couldn't even speak through the now sobbing hysterics I had worked myself into, all I could do was hold up the book pointing to the page where the story started and pointing at him. He took it from me and started reading. He slowly sank into the couch beside me as I tried to get a hold of my emotions. He was completely quiet and he even started to well up but never shedding a tear.
"Judy, I hope those are happy tears"
"they, they ... aaaareeeeeeeee" *sniff*sniff*
"ok, grandpa Jack would have wanted it that way"

I told Charlie that I would try to post the story as long I could read the story without crying. Hasn't happened yet. So maybe another time :)

<3 you Grandpa Jack. I promise that we will share your stories with your great grandchild so it can remember you as fondly as we do.

Genetics...

Last week we saw a genetics specialist. No, nothing is wrong. Everything is just peachy actually :)

Dr. Lee sent us to one because we had some gaps in Charlie's medical history due the fact that he was adopted. We all just wanted to make sure we had all bases covered. Turns out that we learned a lot from our conversation:

1. We are the perfect couple. Because we are from such different ethnic backgrounds any recessive genetics issues that we may have had will cancel each other out. Go figure huh?
2. I'm actually at the average age to have a child (See, told you mom! I'm not too old)
3. Nervous conversation = a very sarcastic but funny couple. 
4. We still do have a very good chance having twins. (this terrifies me but doesn't all at the same time)

Crazy, huh? I guess it was always meant to be.

15 weeks and 4 days, approximately 170 days to go.

Demons..

Amy Whinehouse passed away this weekend. Amy had many demons. She struggled with a many addictions that eventually consumed her. She was an immense talent and I choose to remember her that way. A fantastic singer/songwriter, unique and never letting herself get pigeonholed into a genre. 

R.I.P. Amy, I hope you can rest now.

14 weeks and 2 days...

that's where I sit at the moment. Crazy. I feel like we just found out that we were pregnant. Time seems to be going so quickly and I must say I'm enjoying the ride.

I was exchanging stories with another soon to be mommy about how we came to right now. We had a few things in common: We both were trying for a bit and we both stressed ourselves out to the point that we were 2 weeks late. We both tested and both came up negative.

This got me thinking about how thankful I am right now. I remember looking at that test and being so heartbroken that it was negative. I laid in bed and cried about for what felt like an eternity. It was a horrible feeling. I felt so defeated and thought maybe it wasn't in the cards for me to get pregnant.
Then Charlie said:
"well, now we know that we really want a child, so we just have to keep trying. It will happen when it's meant to.Maybe we just aren't ready right now but we will be soon"
... and I believed him. So we did.

Now here we are 14weeks and 2 days pregnant. We are insanely excited to be parents. We are constantly planning our future family, where we want to live, what kind of schools he or she will go to, what kind of sports he/she will play... that kind of thing. It's a wonderful feeling.

I've learned something. Children are a miracle and are given to you for a reason, whether it be naturally, through adoption or any other means. They come to you when you need them the most and I have a feeling that I'll learn as much from this baby as it will from me.

So that's where it stands...14 weeks, 2 days and approximately 180 days to go.. and thankful.

Happy :)

So we just found out that a good friend of ours is pregnant too :) (no names yet, as I'm not sure if they are telling everyone yet)  Yay!!!!

We have the January kid and they have the February kid.  We couldn't be happier.  Mommy is glowing and beautiful (as always) and Daddy is very excited!

They have decided to keep the baby gender a surprise...awesome! I know I could never do it that way, I think it might be the slight control freak/over planner that I am. Or, in Charlie's words "there's gonna be enough surprises going through this, I don't know if I could take anymore".

Anyways, just a short blog tonight. It's already 1 am and I should be asleep by now. But I was just too excited :)

I know eventually one of you will read this, so:

Congrats guys!
I'm so excited to be pregnant with you guys and you two are going to be amazing parents! :)

Jewapino or Filijew?

Our wedding- May 15th, 2010 (photo credit: Richard Marquez @ where to look photography)

So that's us, last year all dolled up for our wedding. Me and Charlie have always joked about what our children would look like. Its kind of an ongoing joke of how messed up this kid will be. Half Filipino and half Metis/Jewish (the hubby is Metis but was adopted by a wonderful Jewish couple)oh and did we mention that we are also intent on naming our child with a reflection from both cultures.

So take a look at us... these are some of the conclusions we came to:

This kid will have no shortage of hair...ever. 

The wedding is probably the shortest Charlie's hair has been since I met him, and my hair took 3 hours to curl and pin under (I'm so sorry Katrina, you did an amazing job though!) There's is no history of baldness and if my hair was any thicker it would be classified as rope. 

This kid will have big feet.

 For being 5'2, I have enormous feet. Yes folks, I wear a size 10 and they are wide, like Fred Flinstone wide.  As for Charlie, he's a 13. Long and skinny feet though. So regardless this kid is gonna have HUGE feet.

This kid will have bad eyesight.

I wear glasses/contacts and so does Charlie.  We're both blind as bats without them and we are going to be that old couple constantly searching for our glasses when they're on our heads.

This kid will be extremely cultured.

I'm an art/fashion nerd and Charlie is a computer/music nerd. Charlie's father is a musician, his mother is a doctor. My mother is a seamstress, my father is karaoke king and a black belt. Charlie and I both listen to a HUGE array of music, all genres and bpms. We have artists and photographers as friends. So really, I expect this kid to be paying for ol' mom n' pop here by the time it's 16. LOL.

This kid will be never have a shortage of love surrounding him or her.

Both of families have been extremely supportive of this pregnancy are excited for this baby to finally arrive. All of our friends and family have already offered to babysit. Although I don't think we'll ever need to find a babysitter in a pinch because i think it'll be tough trying to get this kid away from both sets of grandparents. All in all, I'm convinced that this kid will not touch the ground for the first year of it's life.

Looks wise we're hoping this kid will get my skin tone, mainly because Charlie tends to burn upon contact with the sun. Other than that, we're pretty open. We're excited to see what he/or she will look like! 

Dr. Vivian Lee...

That's the name of my baby doctor. We met today for my first prenatal appointment.She's quick and definitely knows her job, a very busy lady. Another thing I like about her is that she doesn't coddle me. I would hate to have a doctor that felt the need to hold my hand and tell me that everything is going to be just fine *insert nodding head and puppy dog eyes*  I would probably throw some sarcastic remark her way and be thrown out in a second. If any of you watched Sex In The City, think Miranda... I feel pretty much the same way.

Everything seems to be doing well, I'm doing all the right things. My blood pressure seems to be in check which is amazing considering everyone else in my family has high blood pressure. I just have keep doing what I do and make sure to take my vitamin every day. Speaking of which.... there, done.

Oh and we did the official Facebook announce today :) It's probably why most of you are here reading :)

So yes, we are officially 13 weeks in and apparently 189 more days to go!

YAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Am I strange....

for not wanting to take "belly shots" every week and posting them on Facebook? Not my style. Maybe because I was never a small woman so, maybe, just maybe I'm more self conscious about my tummy than some.  Even before I was pregnant I never wanted any attention called to my midsection and just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean that feeling will change in an instant. I figure that there will be shots of me with a very pregnant belly  anyways so I don't need to be the one to show it off. Although it is my goal to eat a bowl of cereal off my tummy while standing and have that shot by someone (Ronnie, I'm looking in your direction)

No offence to the women who did or are doing the belly shots, I just don't think I have the kahunas to do it. ;p  Don't get me wrong I think a pregnant belly is beautiful and a wonderful thing. I think women should be proud of them, we are creating life in there!  I love that I have someone growing in there and I can feel him/her grow every week. I can no longer suck in my tummy and there's a definite bump growing and I can't wait to see it grow it even more! I don't think I'm strange for not having the belly shots, in fact that's another reason I started this blog. I wanted a way to document this pregnancy for myself and this kid. Let's just face it, this will probably still be online when this kids turns 18.

Choices.

So we (we as in my hubby and in-laws) just got back from the most amazing dinner at Cafe Dario. Go there if you ever get the chance to, it was probably the one of the best restaurant experiences that I've ever had. The food, service and atmosphere was amazing. It was a fixed price menu ($35 per person) and you get your choice of appetizer and entree. It also comes with soup, salad AND dessert! Amazing.... But with the fixed price menu: having specific choices, it got me thinking of the choices this kid will have later in life.

Will he/she have the same opportunities we all had?
Will he/she have the chance to play an instrument in school or will that be another program cut?
Will he/she learn cursive writing as well as typing?
Will he/she be able to take an art class as a part of his/her curriculum or will the arts be passe by then?
Will  he/she have sports teams or will the technological advances of their cell phone be their sense of belonging?
Will he/she know how to play out side and not just on a computer?

...just some of the things I worry about. It seems a bit ridiculous but alot of those things made me who I am today.
I remember playing the recorder and xylophone in elementary ( I was horrible, sorry mom and dad) but it gave me confidence to try new things.
I learned how to use cursive writing instead of just printing , and I was good at it! I loved making my writing look SOOOO fancy :)
Art class was one of the classes I looked forward to every week. I was by far not the best artist in the group but I still loved it. It gave me creative release. It was something other than numbers and science.
Believe it or not, I played a lot of sports. It gave me confidence, sportsmanship and a competitive spirit. I knew I didn't have to win every game, be a starter or captain but, sometimes it was just good enough to be a part of something. All I see now is kids with blackberries and IPhones, texting each other. Hell, I was 23 when I got my first cell phone! Maybe I come from the old school of thought where you can't have something like that until you can pay for it on your own.
One of the saddest stories I've heard recently was that some kids don't know how to play outside. I mean, what?!?! I was in shock, when I was a kid that's all I ever wanted to do. Go ride my bike, play in the sprinkler, race up and down the street with my friends. Most kids now are holed up inside with a video game in front of them and I find that sad. I loved nature walks and staring at clouds.

I know alot of it what our kid becomes will come from us and what we teach it. I know we will have the immense support of family and friends. We do have  ALOT of good people that surround us daily.  I just I hope I make the right choices for this kid myself.

Happy Canada Day!!!

Happy Birthday you old bag, you don't look a day over 100!

We are gonna do the traditional jaunt down Osborne to eat overpriced mini donuts and other various food on a stick :)

on another note:

I'm beginning to see less of my feet, I guess that means I'm showing now. LOL